


and i'll never reconcile (these bright eyes and flashing smile)

by Chitra_Rive, We_deserve_rainbows



Category: The Mechanisms (Band), Ulysses Dies at Dawn - The Mechanisms (Album)
Genre: (i have done research but please point out mistakes if there are any!), Angst, Gen, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Paranoia, an attempt at portraying ocd by two people who don't have it, narcissus and his series of lies about his nonexistent oven, ts can't exactly consent properly if it's being ordered to, unreality, wouldn't call it fluff but they're hangin out!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-19
Updated: 2020-12-19
Packaged: 2021-03-10 17:34:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,096
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28170999
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Chitra_Rive/pseuds/Chitra_Rive, https://archiveofourown.org/users/We_deserve_rainbows/pseuds/We_deserve_rainbows
Summary: Understandably, Narcisus now refused to have a Somnambulist in the house, and shuddered every time his eyes met the vacant gaze of one outside in the street. He was even deeply suspicious of the Toy Soldier at Dionysus’ speakeasy, despite its unconventional yet obvious sentience.-Orpheus and Narcissus go on a Trip to the Seasideor: where and how did narcissus get a copy of once upon a time in space as a book
Relationships: Ivy Alexandria & The Toy Soldier, The Toy Soldier (The Mechanisms) & Narcissus (Ulysses Dies At Dawn)
Kudos: 17





	and i'll never reconcile (these bright eyes and flashing smile)

**Author's Note:**

> we have once again written cowritten fic at the late hours of the night! this time we're branching out from ts sadness. slightly. the toy soldier is still here and sad. baby steps.
> 
> the title is from narcissus under the knife, a song by jessica law in the ulysses dies at dawn canon; we suggest you listen to it and read the fiction orpheus and narcissus go to the seaside before reading for full context!

narcissus decidedly did not like the toy soldier. it was just something in its manner, in its bearing, its uncanny grin. it felt like some sort of bad omen; he fell down a rabbit hole every time it did something strikingly familiar, imagining it as a ghost of a fate that he did not want to have. if he kept avoiding it, perhaps he could avoid being jinxed; but he had a sinking suspicion it had been too late for that quite a while ago. lately, it was even harder to ignore, given the fact that it'd replaced his friend, who he would much rather be spending an evening with right now, instead of having to dodge its cheerful attentions by hiding behind various things. and right now, it looked like his always slim luck had run dry once again.

'hello, narcissus! splendid party, isn't it? i've been looking for you all evening! we haven't talked once since i-' a falter- 'was hired!'

never one to sully his public appearance, narcissus coughed once and took a small step back before smiling as genuinely as he was able, 'hello, toy soldier. yes, thank you.' it just grinned at him. he found himself unable to look away from its (far too still) face. 'er well-' he tried to say as an exit from this very uncomfortable conversation

its voice spun to life once more. 'i have something for you! a gift!' 

narcissus' face fell.  _ oh joy, _ he snipped internally before regaining his poise. 'lovely.'

'it's a book! i thought you might like it, it's a copy of one my friend made and she's very smart and makes nice things!' it handed over a worn embossed book with a cover. narcissus reluctantly took it, trying -and failing- to avoid touching its hands. he was half expecting to meet the cold flesh of someone long dead, but it was instead wood sanded down to the point it had an unexpected smoothness to it. flinching away, he almost dropped the book and had to bat it back and forth between his hands so it didn’t fall.

'thank you; i'll read it... at my earliest convenience. i do appreciate it, but you must realize i am far too caught up in other things to spend much time on literature.' he opened the book and flipped through. it was  _ old _ , with yellowing pages. people wanted new things, of course, but he could very easily sell it as some sort of antique.

its voice seemed far - _ far _ \- too human for a moment, 'lovely! i hope you like it!' but then narcissus looked up from where he had fixed his stare on the ornate carpet. the toy soldier was just that. a toy soldier that dionysus had replaced his friend with. it was false, nothing more. even so, narcissus shuddered. he didn’t like it and he wanted it out of his house. perhaps he could bring it up with dionysus next time he saw him. 

the toy soldier saluted. narcissus tucked the book under his arm. 'right, well, i should go.. put this away.' 

'oh what a spiffing idea! i shall accompany you!' narcissus, faced with the prospect of spending further time with it, looked around for anyone who could help him. but no, just the anonymous people, floating on lotus and in no fit state to help him.

'oh, well you see...' his gaze flitted about, trying to find some excuse. 'i've left the oven on! always forget to turn it off, how silly of me.'

'oh! you should go fix that, then! i'll go with you to make sure you don't forget!'

'right.. actually before i go fix the oven i think i should probably..' narcissus wracked his mind for things to do that the toy soldier wouldn't want to help with, 'check to see if the doors are locked.' he finished lamely. 'and you could just stay and have a nice time.'

'i'll come with you so that you don't forget the oven! that seems important!' it seemed no less insistent, and even more enthusiastic. hmm. narcissus would  _ really _ rather not it come with him. 

when he bought it dionysus had explained that one of its features was that it would follow any order, he could solve this whole thing for himself right now. it was clearly sentient, but how much did that bother him  _ really _ . he could just order it to leave him alone.

he spent a second trying to mentally phrase the command in a way that sounded blithe. 'it's quite dull, really, just wait here.' he puts extra weight on the last two words, hoping its programming got the hint.

right away its demeanor changed. it snapped a salute. narcissus couldn't help but think of this salute as more hollow than the one that came before, somehow. it stood stock still, waiting on his return and further orders. thank gods. narcissus was able to tear himself away from it, and the cold grip its mere presence had on his soul.

he walked away briskly. his excuses had been complete lies- he didn't even own an oven- but now he thought he should probably check the door locks a fifth time, just in case. was it the fifth? it could be the fourth, or third, or perhaps he'd never checked at all. how could he be sure? his mind could so easily conjure up illusions based on checking them on previous days. what if people who wished him harm had somehow gotten in? he pulled the scarf around his neck tighter, just in case. making his way to the doors and triple-checking them, they were solidly locked; but what if someone was already inside? he didn't know everyone present well, as it was his manner to invite people over for parties when he wanted to put off talking to them and then hope that when they arrived they would be too distracted by the entertainment to have a lengthy conversation. in fact, the toy soldier followed  _ any _ order- it could have so easily been ordered to distract him! 

he ran back to it, not sparing any time or mind to its disposition. 'toy soldier, tell me if there's anyone else here who's been ordering you about.' as soon as he said that he remembered that the sorts of people he was worried about were skilled at reprogramming a human mind to follow orders. maybe they could have made it so the toy soldier could only follow  _ their _ orders, and this was all an elaborate ruse.

'the only person who has given me on order is you and others you have invited here!' it exclaimed, stepping out of the spot where it has been waiting, 'is the oven off?' it didn't seem to be genuinely  _ asking _ , but its voice was terribly genuine. he shook his head, dismissing something (dismissing what, he wasn't sure) and hardened his voice into an order. 

'tell me the truth.' those closest to the scene, no matter how much lotus was running through their veins, were alerted to something going on.

'i am being wholly truthful!' it sounded confused. 

narcissus looked at it intently. could it lie to him? that order was clear, but he just wasn't  _ sure _ . 'how can i know that for sure?' a thought occurred to him. 'and who were the other guests? or rather, did they order you to do anything-- suspicious? out of the ordinary? to ignore something covert, or something of the like?' the toy soldier could have been ordered to unlock the doors. he should check them again. had he checked them at all that night, or had he gotten distracted and gone to question the toy soldier instead?

'just the usual orders! nothing i haven't encountered at work!' 

okay... okay that was good. he knew what happened at work and it was nothing he needed to worry about.

the toy soldier seemed to bounce on the balls of its feet, if it were anyone else he would have said it looked on edge, but it was the toy soldier, so narcissus did not say that. he looked at the carpet again, mind uncomfortably torn between questioning it further and checking the locks again.

'don't go anywhere.' and he went off to check the locks again, trying to to spare nervous glances at the people he had invited into his home.

the toy soldier was dreadfully disappointed in the outcome of its actions. it had always loved when ivy showed it her records and archives and things; why hadn't narcissus been excited? not only that, he seemed rather worried whenever it was about. was it something it was doing? and then he was ordering it. that seemed to be the normal thing for people to do now. it didn't much like everyone knowing it had to do what it was told. it'd enjoy its job a lot more if it could have some kind of say in the matter. it didn't matter much though, it could pretend splendidly. 

no time to dwell on it; narcissus was coming back, fingers interlaced behind his neck in an attempt at coming off as casual (personally, he thought he was doing an excellent job).

'hello old chap!' it seemed awfully excited to see him, waving in that robotic way that still made narcissus shudder. 

he didn't say anything just yet, not quite sure what he could say. he stood a few feet away from it for a moment, thinking to the rather flowery conversation orpheus had subjected him to when they had both been told how the toy soldier worked, about its "unconventional yet obvious sentience". it couldn't help but feel like an empty shell to him, like all the somnambulists on the streets of the city that were oh so hard to avoid. was it, though? its mannerisms were awfully similar to them, it was true, but they seemed less stiff and programmed in. or rather, they  _ were _ stiff, but only when it was acting on command. 

maybe narcissus had been a tad rash with all the orders.

'apologies for leaving you here, old thing; why don't we go put this in the library together?' it might be a good idea to get out of here, anyway. he could feel everyone's gazes on him. it struck him that anyone could wear a mask. 

'that sounds splendid!' it rocked back and forth on the balls of its feet, seeming eager to set off. he still couldn't look at it and its eerie smile head on, but its voice seemed strangely a bit more natural and less forced. that could be a good omen? its voice was. far too natural, actually. but at least it was excited? 'oh, but what about your oven? i can't let you keep forgetting, i'd be a bad friend if i let your lovely house burn down!' 

'about that-' it would be easy to say that he didn't have an oven. the toy soldier probably wouldn't even question it. 'i have one of those specialist ovens, you see, it hardly looks like an oven at all, and i can turn it off from where i am now.' he did an elaborate motion that could be construed as something you would do to turn off a very expensive remotely controlled oven.

'oh. why did you-' 

'let's go to the library, shall we?'

the toy soldier supposed that it shouldn’t pry, ovens were quite interesting to it and a  _ specialist _ ovens were even  _ more _ interesting. even so, it was ever so happy for narcissus to finally seem to want to be its friend! or at least to want to go to the library.

to it, narcissus seemed to be acting differently than he had been before. less of the faux poise and refined steely cynic persona that the toy soldier had come to except narcissus to project at parties. less, even, of the glances and fingers nervously dancing over his sleeves. instead, he seemed to listen more closely to the toy soldier as it spoke, snapping his fingers as they walked together through the oddly lit hallways.

as they walked to the library the toy soldier chattered on about the book that it had gotten for him. well, rather, it talked about all the types of uniforms that it considered ever so spiffing.

he still didn't look at it, its uncanny smile and the strange way its limbs contorted as it spoke sending unwelcome memories through his head, but this was okay, they were going to the library, he was being nice.


End file.
